Show me your...

Ada's favorite thing lately is showing off her body parts when you ask her to show you one. She loves showing off her belly, nose, and ears. Her favorite body part is her ears. Her face lights up when you ask her where her ears are. She gets this big smile and her giggle will melt your heart! You can't help but laugh along with her. She is almost 14 months old and the stuff she knows constantly amazes us. She is growing up way too fast! She loves copying everything that Benjamin does. She is a mover and a shaker and is constantly on the go. Ada says a few words but she is really quiet. We eagerly await the day she talks non-stop like her big brother!

My Birthday

Happy 30th Birthday to me!! At first I was really depressed about turning 30, because man let's face it--that's old! I have a lot of great memories from being in my twenties. I met the love of my life (David) and was lucky enough to have married him. I finished graduate school. I started my "first" out of college job as an Extension Educator. Our son was born in 2005 and we were blessed with our daughter in 2007. I have enjoyed being in my twenties as the memories are great. I kept telling myself, family, and friends that I would actually be celebrating my first anniversary of turning 29 (see I didn't actually have to say 30!). But the more I thought about things, why would I want to stay 29? I went through a lot this past year. In January, I had surgery to remove my gallbladder. In May, I suffered and survived kidney stones (passing those nasty stones a few days before I would have had surgery to remove them and the surgery they suggested did not sound pleasant). And in November, I suffered a miscarriage and lost our baby. So I plan on holding my head up and embrace being 30 and hope that many, many good things come my direction. I thought I would share a picture of how I am handling being "30". It's my blog so just roll with it!

Dave and the kids surprised me with a dozen beautiful carnations sitting in a vase on our kitchen table when I came home from work. They also gave me a beautiful string of chocolate pearls with matching earrings! But the sweetest thing they left me was a note.

By the way, Benjamin kept telling me that it was not my birthday. I asked how come it was not my birthday and he told me that he took it away!

Remember our Veterans...

I just wanted to take this time to give a BIG Thank YOU to all our servicemen and veterans who have given of themselves to fight for our freedom. We owe you all so much!! Thank you just doesn't seem like enough to say for all you have done for us. Please have a Happy Veteran's Day and know that there are many people who appreciate all you have done for us!!

Emotional Roller Coaster...

"An Ugly Pair of Shoes"
I am wearing a pair of shoes. They are ugly shoes. Uncomfortable shoes. I hate my shoes. Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair. Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step. Yet, I continue to wear them. I get funny looks wearing these shoes. They are looks of sympathy. I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs. They never talk about my shoes. To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable. To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them. But, once you put them on, you can never take them off. I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes. There are many pairs in the world. Some women are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them. Some have learned how to walk in them so they don't hurt quite as much. Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think of how much they hurt. No woman deserves to wear these shoes. Yet, because of the shoes I am a stronger woman. These shoes have given me the strength to face anything. They have made me who I am. I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.

~~Author Unknown

Dave and I were hoping to announce happy news about the upcoming addition to our family but on October 7, 2008 we found out that our baby was not meant to be and that we would lose him or her. It was devastating to us as we went in for a routine doctor’s appointment (we were two days away from being 12 weeks along). My doctor recommended an ultrasound (he did not suspect anything wrong with my pregnancy or with our baby) so we could get early measurements of the baby in hopes of avoiding a 3rd broken arm (2 broken arms in the family are enough)! He gave us the ultrasound forms and the “see you in 4 weeks” paperwork and we were on our way for the ultrasound. In the waiting area on the ultrasound floor I kept praying that everything would be okay with our baby (I had this bad feeling that something was wrong).

Our world came to a screeching halt as the ultrasound doctor came in and started explaining the findings of the ultrasound to us. We were crying, shocked, sadden, and in disbelief. All kinds of questions and thoughts were running through our mind. We were left alone to grieve over the life that was not to be. We then saw “my” doctor who confirmed the ultrasound findings and gave us 3 options: schedule a D & C surgery, use medication to speed along the miscarriage, or wait and let it happen naturally. I (we) decided to wait and let it happen naturally for a variety of reasons. The surgery seemed so invasive and not natural (I (we) understood that surgery may be medically necessary if there was too much blood loss or if infection, etc. occurred), medication did not seem like the right choice to push things along as my brother’s wedding was taking place in 3 days and I was going to be gone for mandatory training for work the next week. So letting it happen naturally was the best choice for me (us); although, we realized that the miscarriage could take place at any time we were okay with our choice.

Prior to my doctor’s appointment my biggest dilemma was trying to figure out a way to tell my family about our upcoming bundle of joy and not steal my sister-in-law’s day (it was her wedding day and every bride deserves her “day”) or figure out a way where I would not be put in the position of having to accept or decline an alcoholic drink (as a bridesmaid having at least one drink comes with the role that you play & in my family if you pass up a drink everyone assumes you are pregnant). I spent that weekend instead answering the hard questions from family and friends as to if we were going to have any more children, how many would we like to have, and when were we going to try again, etc. It was very tough to not break down that entire weekend as we were still coming to terms with the news. It was also very tough to hold it together when I was asked these questions and listening to others talk about their joy of being in the motherly way; all the while holding back our sorrow.

On November 4, 2008, we saw my doctor again as I had not had the miscarriage yet (4 weeks of waiting). He confirmed through another ultrasound that my pregnancy was a non-viable pregnancy (we asked for reassurance as we had no signs/symptoms of miscarriage after 4 weeks of waiting) and that miscarriage was inevitable. Due to the risk of infection we had the choice of medication or surgery. I (we) chose the medicine option. That evening I suffered the miscarriage.

We are still grieving, healing, and attempting to move on since I have had the miscarriage but feel time, thoughts, and prayers will help us heal. I will always remember our child that we lost and wonder if our baby would have been a boy or girl, have blue eyes, whether or not he or she would have been blonde or brunette, etc. Even though we lost our baby early on we are still grieving a loss and all the emotions that come with losing someone that you love and care about. If you have any prayers to spare my family and I could really use them.

***FYI---I did not write the poem above.

Usborne Books...

For those of you who may not have heard, I am hosting an Usborne Books eShow and catalogue party. Between my consultant's busy schedule and my schedule we could not come up with a date that worked for us before the 1st of the year so I decided to forgo the home show and try this.

A child's interest in reading and learning is stimulated by the lavish illustrations and informative content. There are over 1300 bright, colorful and fun titles covering activities, puzzles and a wide range of subjects for children of all ages.

This is the information you need to check out and order Usborne Books: www.ubah.com/HOS130348. When: now thru 11/18/2008 11:58:00 PM. Everyone is welcome, so invite a friend to check out Usborne Books. If you order on-line the books ship to you within a couple of days and go directly to you. Otherwise, you can place a catalogue order with me and I will deliver them to you.

All I can say is that Benjamin and Ada love these books and that they can take quite a beating and still hold up! The other nice thing is that if something were to happen to your books--let's say the cover falls off, you can replace them for 50% off. Last year when I held a home show I thought Benjamin would go outside and play in the sandbox with Dave but that did not happen. Benjamin saw all the displays of books and he went straight over there and starting taking the books off the shelves one by one and looking through them. He then picked out his favorites and would bring them to me or Dave to read to him. Let's just say he was definitely the salesman that day!

It's a rewarding experience when a child opens a book and discovers the magic of reading. Please share the above link with anyone you think might be interested in Usborne Books. Let me know if you have any questions. With Christmas right around the corner, now is a wonderful opportunity to get some shopping done without even leaving home! Thanks for looking and Happy Shopping!!

A Benjamin Funny

Benjamin was GRUMPY today!! Boy was he grumpy. When I went to pick the kids up from Dani's house today Benjamin was still grumpy and wearing his grumpy pants. While Benjamin was getting his jacket and shoes on Dani asked him if he was going to wear his happy pants tomorrow. Benjamin said "no, I am not going to wear my happy pants, I am going to wear my comfy pants tomorrow." Travis (Dani's husband), Dani, and I started to laugh. What a little ham!

Just like Benjamin

Ada loves doing whatever her big brother Benjamin does. She will play follow the leader all day if you let her (or actually, if Benjamin will let her). These two play together so well that it is almost unbelievable! But, rest assured they also have their moments. We hear Benjamin say, "Don't bother me, Ada" or "Mom, Ada's bothering me", and "Stop it Ada", etc. Sometimes Benjamin and Ada will fight over certain books and toys, etc. but we never know who the winner will be as Ada can definitely hold her own and fights to the finish. So far these two really get along--we hope that it continues!!